I’ll be honest, I’m not even sure how to start this one. I’ve been kicking around the idea of doing video posts so that I can rant and rave at you all and don’t have to worry about such things as grammar and run-on sentences, and this review really would be a GREAT choice for it. I’m still getting my feet under me with the video thing though, so ye-olde text post it is.
Since I reviewed the original rodeoH harness they have come out with two additional styles- a boxer-brief and a femme panty. I’ve been told by many who work with rodeoH on a business-to-business level that they are very receptive to customer/reviewer feedback and opinions, so I thought maybe just maybe they had improved their product design. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Oh man was I wrong. So very wrong.
Things that haven’t changed: The harness still comes in a uselessly tiny microfibre bag, though this time the bag has a LOT more writing on it (so I wouldn’t recommend using it to clean your 90’s throwback UFO sunglasses, which I’m sure someone is going to bring back into style any day now). You still get a stupid dog-tag with your harness. The overall construction remains the same as well, it’s underpants, but the crotch lining comes up almost to the waistband in the front, so as to create the barrier between the toy and you. Again this is topped with a thin strip of elastic, for reasons that make no sense at all to me. The o-ring is the same size and rigidity as the original as well. While I didn’t have any issues with the stitching popping on this one, I also didn’t really try to put anything larger than a 1″ toy in it. There were a LOT of loose threads from manufacturing left on my harness, which I find rather inexcusable. It’s not that hard nor does it take long to go in and snip your threads. It’s part of finishing your product, and part of quality control.
So, basically, the rodeoH panty is just a swap out of materials to be femme? Well… sorta. I kinda wish that were the case actually. If they’d kept the same cut to the fabric and just swapped lace into the mix instead of the regular ol’ cotton, the panty would at least work as everyday underwear. But, and I’m sure you all saw THAT coming, they didn’t. Oh man did they not.
The folks at rodeoH seem to like low-rise things for some reason. Ok, that’s fine. I’m no fan of granny-panties myself either. Something that rides on my hips is nice, can be flattering, and with a harness I can understand maybe wanting to be a bit more scant than not. I’ll give ya that. The panty however is SO VERY low rise that it’s not even underwear. I’ve taken to calling it a “crotch-swatch”, because I like things that rhyme and well- it’s the best way to sum this thing up. I have the exact same size in both of the rodeoH harnesses. My background is in costuming, so I know my way around a tape measure and my body to make sure I get the right size of clothing. These things are cut SO low rise that I can lay them down atop the original and there’s almost a full two inches of material in height difference. What does this mean when worn? It means that my entire, yes ENTIRE, ass is hanging out of these. The waistband just barely clears the curve of the lower quarter of my butt. Crotch-swatch. There is no allowance in the cut of the fabric for any booty at all. It’s almost as if these were made for a paperdoll. Their sizing is based on your hip measurement, and I’ve got to wonder what person with a 41″ hip DOESN’T have some butt comprising part of that number?
I have noticed a trend in the marketing images from rodeoH, as well as their user-submitted images on FaceBook and Twitter. They are all small, slight, androgynous, and/or athletic tiny people. In fact, I think that Shine Louise is the “largest” person I’ve seen in any of their marketing images. So I have to wonder if these are being made for and tested on this demographic only? I know for sure a garment cut and designed like this would NEVER have made it out of the fitting room for me, because as soon as you even hand it to someone with what are supposedly the proper measurements, they will laugh in your face.
I have a hard time recommending this harness, and I feel a little bad about that. Not because I feel bad about disliking a product (I do that more than I like things), but because SheVibe was so kind as to let me review this for them. If this were the only femme harness on the market, I’d say that maybe if you can try one on first (over your undies please, let’s not be gross) or you have a very slight build with little to no butt, that this might be a good inexpensive entry point into the underwear styled harnesses. But it’s NOT the only femme harness on the market, and the others out there really do have the rodeoH panty beat by leaps and bounds (and bells and whistles).
I had wanted to try the boxer-brief version that rodeoH made between the original and the panty, but now that I’ve tried their stuff twice and both times been left laughing at the product so hard that I nearly peed myself, I think I’m done. Unless they finally figure out that people have curves and those curves need to fit into the garment.