Oh captain… my captain… (yes, this reference will get used more than once in this review, so let’s just come to terms with that right now shall we?). Good Vibrations’ Captain has been hanging around my apartment for some time. I’ve used it as a model for some interesting projects, taken it along as a teaching tool, and sent it home with my Brother. I’ll be honest- I’m more than a bit intimidated by the Captain. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m not a size queen. I don’t immediately go for the largest thing I can stuff up my cunt, and I definitely do not aim high when it comes to trying to fit things in my ass. So when I got the Captain in the mail, boy was I worried when upon taking it out of the box I couldn’t wrap my fingers around the widest point on here. No really, and I have long fingers too.
Once I got over my shock on the size of the Captain (yes, I’d read the specs on it, but that didn’t mean it really computed in my head until I had it cock-in-hand), I was really astounded by what I saw. The Captain has probably one of the best sculpt jobs I’ve seen on a realistic cock EVER. I really do wonder if this was a life-cast rather than a free sculpt. It’s just so well done. Firstoff- the Captain is asymmetrical. If you were to bisect it right down the length, you would end up with two rather different halves. There’s a pronounced bulge to one side. The veins aren’t mirrored on both sides. The frenulum isn’t straight. The corona isn’t perfectly even. These aren’t casting defects, this is how the Captain was made, and I love it. If more cocks were made like this, I’d probably like realistic toys a hell of a lot better than I do.
The Captain is of GoodVibes’ own manufacture. I’m not sure who is doing the fabrication on these, but I’m sure curious. The texture is wonderful for a single-density silicone. Firm but not rock hard, with a soft velvety texture. The only part that is glossy silicone is the flat end on the base. This is probably the least linty silicone toy I’ve come across to-date, and I’ve really put this one through the wringer when it comes to lint collection (a story for another day, but trust me it’ll get told). I feel like if there were any improvements to be made on the texture here, it’s that I want to see what this would be like in dual-density. Oh gd, just thinking about that makes me wonder if we’re on the verge of the awesomest realistic cocks out there. We just might be. Well, except for one thing…
The size. Yes- I’ve tried the Captain (I think I’d risk being keelhauled if I didn’t). No, it didn’t go very well. At 7 1/2″ long and 1 7/8″ wide, the Captain is really asking a lot of me. I can’t say for sure, since I’ve never actually measured any of the real-life cocks I’ve enjoyed, but this certainly FEELS like way too much of a challenge. My vagina is not a happy camper with this much girth at all with this firm of a material. That’s part of why I want to see this in dual-density, that outer squishy layer does amazing things for being able to stuff large things up inside me. For those who love a big cock, or are fans of toys that give a serious sense of fullness? Definitely check it out.
What did the boys have to say? Well…
Captain, my captain! You would think the boy would start getting nervous whenever we get the call that his Big Sister has ANOTHER huge toy for us to review. Good Vibes’Captain was no exception. This was one of the first giant toys passed our way and you should have seen the way his eyes watered! You might begin to think it hurt him, but if you really know the boy you know that joy is usually what makes him cry. Though some of those tears were from pain, that’s because we like things rough. This toy performed well on all fronts: harness, underwear, between my legs, in my hands, and when left alone with the boy. His only real complaint was the rigidity of this form of silicone. Though it is softer than the Tantus Goliath he bought several years ago (one of the largest silicone life-like dildos on the market in it’s time). Captain is slightly larger: 1/8 inches of girth and 1/4 inch in length, but it’s suppleness made it easier to accommodate and that length really makes the difference when thrusting. I complain often that I lose length when using a harness (and could still really use this girthy of toy with a bit more length) but they are getting closer. The realness of the shape of this cock is remarkable and if large, life-like, veiny, cocks are your thing the Captain can take you to shore.
Huge thanks to Good Vibes for making the Captain, and for letting us come aboard. After time with the Captain, I might just have to give the First Mate a go as well, lest I get forced to walk the plank.